Someone did this. That’s the first thought, in the black dawn, after the drops of rain. All the countries are following the same pattern of shutdown. My dog is beside me, and all I can think about is how I am going to get him a giant bag of kibbles, and his cans, and where I am going to do that, today.
The thought occurs, they hoarded this too.
We are all in some kind of lost landscape now. It’s the same. It’s just after six, and I think of my grandmother saying, “It is always darkest before the dawn.” She’s right. The light will make it easier, writing makes it easier. I spent the morning looking at headlines. I could look at the maps. Looking at the maps only makes it worse. Why some places and not others?
I think about sewing a mask, maybe two or three. I’m not sure what to wear when I go out now. I have gloves from Thailand I was able to find. Latex gloves from an Import store, the one I found the toilet paper in. It is hard to adjust to being unfree, to having to wear certain things. At the market, people in the blue paper masks. I wonder where they got them.
To the south of me a city sprawls for miles.
To the north it is the same.
They have stripped the stores.
There are hundreds of videos on how to sew masks, from all over the world. In a box there is fabric, I could try. The last two times I went out I wore a muffler, that I could wrap around my face. I don’t understand the idea of all the people who order online. I like to go out and about, say hello to the people I know in places. It’s this terrible feeling of missing them, just people who own restaurants, people working. The stores are closed. There is the worry of how any of this will ever be able to come back after a few months. How things will look after that.
There are a million questions. Someone knows the answer.
Dawn has broken over the city. I can still hear the owls and the birds. There is the matter of facing the day, facing the speeches, trying to eat. Trying to think of anything that can make this seem normal. At the store there were flowers. They were all on sale, and they are joy. The wildflowers are up. Maybe it is the smallest things, that can feed the soul in so much silence. The very smallest things.
I planted Sweet Peas.
I can work in the garden. I can try and breathe, through the fear. There are youtubes of others and how they are coping. I can make bread. For now I can make some bread.
I feel sad about Facebook, not being able to see my friends. I think right now I am socially isolating even from that, as there is not a way to speak about what we are all going through.
I am trying to set up tags and categories, as this should not fall under uncategorized, and I can’t see how to do that, anymore, easily, WP has changed so much.
One of the things from yesterday, the hospitals are totally unequipped with gowns and masks and the proper equipment for the nurses, down in Los Angeles they talked about that. Our healthcare system has been so broken in America for so many years, how could this happen now? The tragedy for the doctors and the nurses. In Youtube we can see images of Italy and the other countries. That is what I have had to use for breaking news.
Here is news on the nurses and the masks they need https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EhkUolbaAaU the N95 mask. They are having to sew their own masks. This is one of the saddest stories I have ever seen. My god. It is said that there are 35 million of these masks already made, but to make them work without the proper medical supplies and outfits? Here in our country? It shows how broken things are.
This shows some information on the masks. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WmdxDsVO7Gc no one has these on the shelves here, or the gloves, r even the hand sanitizers – you cannot find them. The N95 is the one that the nurses need and people probably wish they had them. I do.
This is fantastic news – I got this from the President’s tweets on that Malaria drug <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">NEW DATA: A French study has demonstrated evidence that the combination of Hydroxychloroquine & Azithromycin are highly effective in treating Covid-19.<br><br>The patients enrolled in the study showed complete viral eradication around the 5th day of treatment. <a href="https://t.co/WnGs5PKOpn">https://t.co/WnGs5PKOpn</a> <a href="https://t.co/JZzZ66w4rL">pic.twitter.com/JZzZ66w4rL</a></p>— Michael Coudrey (@MichaelCoudrey) <a href="https://twitter.com/MichaelCoudrey/status/1241354642417577986?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">March 21, 2020</a></blockquote> https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
Watching these maps is the hardest and seeing what is happening. It is the strangest feeling to be so isolated. We can’t go out and so we wait to hear. Only for food and the most basic things, so it feels not like this country. It feels very scary. Three weeks ago, as the news was breaking on this and Wuhan, I asked if the drugstore had the masks? They had been sold out. Then a week later, after seeing the news and seeing people in masks and gloves I asked for the gloves? Sold out. Then we saw the panic. The store shelves emptied of even things like toilet paper. All the paper was gone, and many of the foods that you see were also gone. This has added to the FEAR that people feel.
The news organizations are not reporting the same things, so I am trying to bypass and just find out myself. I do this using Google and Twitter and Youtube and I do a word search on any of these things.
It’s so quiet, only the birds sing.
No one is on the streets, people are inside. We are following the orders. WATCHING THIS now – to see what the President has to say: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4czayodBQ3o from NBC news. Pence “We are now six days into our 15 days” – but this is NOT what NEWSOM is saying.
It’s not clear how we are 6 days into the 15 days makes any sense. If you were to go out and be exposed to it? It takes two weeks on the symptoms, so you would have to start that count all over again, if you went out for groceries. Pence talking all about prayers and so forth.
FEMA on the testing, he is calm and very clear on this. He is giving a rundown on who should be tested first. No he is talking about STATE MANAGED testing sites. They are saying that the supplies can be gotten THROUGH FEMA for the doctors and nurses and tha these can be ordered from overseas. They have allocated a hundred million to help the states?
Dr. Carson speaking now on HOMES.
We are so broken as a country after 2008. We really were. So many lost everything they had and now are homeless all over the streets in California. There are fears that this virus will travel very fast “on the streets” in this population.
One of the hard things to watch right now is the people losing their jobs. They will lose everything. So we worry that there will be more homeless people. The news on unemployment claims has gone up overnight.
Now the Press Pool is asking questions.
DT “Doing a package, the likes we have never done before.” “I want $$$$ to be used for workers”
DT on masks. PENCE 1/2 billion dollar order on masks, coordinating through FEMA. N95 masks greatly increased in the country. N95 masks will work but did not have liability protection. Industrial N95 can be purchased. Bi-Partisan accomplishment.
DT on sanitizing masks, Fauci on reusing them.
PPE is what they call all the masks and gowns and things that are needed by the doctors. Pence asking people to donate masks, and dentists give the masks to hospitals…
DT the malaria drug, NY is getting it. I have much more faith in DT at this time. Give people something. “We have very sick people” – malaria drug will go to NY and other places. DT wishes China had told us earlier, given advance warning. He is talking about how we saw the problem via the news. That is the truth. How I saw about the problem was on the news via Google and I think that was only about ONE MONTH AGO.
What is so hard is to see the news from all over the world, and the only way to see what is going on? Is to use WORD SEARCHES by country in GOOGLE NEWS. For this story I used Google news on California. https://www.sacbee.com/news/coronavirus/article241383646.html – that is off the Sacramento Bee a well respected newspaper. Seeing a headline like this? Pure fear.
I think we would need to see Newsom speak about THAT? People would rather know, but at the same time see ACTION. I have much respect for President Trump right now.
PENCE “heed your own local government” – why does this make me scared? it is as if all of American is not on one page. That? Is the most frightening thing. This conference is almost over but, what Pence is saying is NO COMFORT. None.